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ALBERTA PODCAST

The Only Podcast in Alberta

20. Legacy Media

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Chris and Keifer are back in the saddle, so to speak, and taking a special look today at magazines targeted at the modern Alberta cow-man, reviews of the pet store at the West Edmonton Mall that got closed down, and getting to the bottom (or the centre, or maybe the edges) of the Flat Earth conspiracy. And we never hesitate to ridicule Jason Kenney's physical appearance or alienate our Greek listeners. Hi! Hello!

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Come knock on the door of the ALBERTA PODCAST speakeasy. On tap tonight: the inaugural Crime Rodeo, DNA reconstruction tech, bad cops, our fancyboy Prime Minister and ridculing surviving World War II veterans. Why put your money in your mattress when you can put it in videos about how white people are the real victims of racism? Chris 'Don Juan Ghermezian' Valentine and Keifer 'No-Nickname' Dallison seperate the fact from opinion. The password is 'Joop Cousteau.'

The Most Wanted Deadbeat Dads list can be found at https://oig.hhs.gov/fraud/child-support-enforcement/wanted.asp

For more information on the future of Medicine Hat, visit https://mymh.city

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It's another Chris Free Episode (CFE). Scott, Emily, and Greg join Keifer in the Alberta Studio to read some letters. Should we be allowed to shoot people if they're drunk? What will become of the big pipeline? Where should you go if you want to make out with boys in Cochrane? Is it actually cool and good to touch bears on the tummy? Is your space heater safe? What's the score? 

The answers to these questions and also some other cool stuff in this very special BONUS episode of Alberta Podcast!

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Happy Lunar New Year to friends-of-the-show Chloe Kim and Margaret Cho. We're getting the droogs together for brunch with Frito-Lay and Pepsi-Co, taking a romantic chairlift ride, destroying the traditions of the Edmonton CFL team, shredding puppers, making an internal evacuation due to a noxious odour and ending the socialist NDP policy of performing abortions in gender-neutral bathrooms. Some of our jokes aren't jokes -- but hell, the speed limit signs in Okotoks aren't even speed limit signs. Don Drizzle, Cowboy Blan and Reeve Steeve Wikkerink guest-star.

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This is a special emergency session of Alberta Podcast recorded live at an inter-provincial peace summit held in Vancouver, BC at the corporate headquarters of unserious "gaming" podcast Super Hopped-Up. For more information on Super Hopped-Up, do a Google search for that name. No other podcast comes up. Not like a certain someone we could name...

Harambe, Stephanie, Ed Whalen, 5'6" medieval combat enthusiast guys, public art, rowdy teens, corporate marijuana, beer choir, Eritrea, and an awesome story about quitting Scouts. Plus a special guest appearance from DJ Sabotage!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELqhUjIxwF8&t=3s
This is the full Ethiopian Joke. 

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Food security and drought are problems that still impact the day-to-day lives of people in Ethiopia. If you would like to donate, or learn more about how you can help Ethiopia, please follow the links bellow:

https://www.actionagainsthunger.org/countries/africa/ethiopia

http://www.charitywater.org/our-projects/africa/ethiopia

https://www.ethiopiaid.org.uk/

 

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Alberta Podcast is for the children. This episode goes out to all the halal beef boys and all the 3D printer girls in Generation Zed who are going to take this dust bowl the Millennials made and turn it into something FUTURETECH. Plus: more mayhem in Red Deer, BC and Alberta standing on the brink of war, the Kent Hehr Defense Force, trouble in Taber, more big scores and an examination of Balzac Billy.

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This Ain't Canadaland XXX. Rock the beat with 12 year-old DJ SABOTAGE and his loud-smoking music teacher. Plus mind sex with Dwayne Johnson, erotic train derailment, hockey chads gone wild, and chasing the Alberta Advantage with the American Dream. I will shoot your dog and not even think twice about it.

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This isn't a comedy podcast, it's a tragedy podcast. If this is your first time listening to the show, we might recommend you try a different episode, because this one is pretty bleak. Getting wood, being honoured by the Japanese emperor, joining the YPJ, bears eating ice cream, a living nightmare of chronic pain, the benevolence of the Burger King with his serfs, Steve Buscemi and Harvey Keitel are ROIDCOPS, and a murder near Keifer's house.

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We're calling on all freedom-loving Albertans to stand up in defense of your right to nude swimming and therapy chickens. We're daring you to dream of the opposite of a mall. We're putting all child sex abusers on blast and blowing open the Jason Klaus/Joshua Frank triple murder case like an Edmonton manhole cover. And we're keeping it real for the 10th Street Boys. Would it be safe to say that we're a couple of stone-cold killers?

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I do solemnly swear on my dear mother's life to make this my primary purchasing area, to uphold the Nudist's Creed, respect the early culture of the new funicular, to learn volume, area, perimeter, and some basic facts about the career of Jaromir Jagr. I will uphold the values of Freak Lunchbox, install custom grips on my snowblower, never again do cocaine at the Keg or Montana's, and vow to stay away from Carly Rae Jepsen's high school forever more. And I will never fucking talk to anyone about this podcast. Fuck to NDP and Trudeau.

You can find more information about Calgary Nude Recreation at calgarynuderecreation.ca.

For more information on the Time Boy, visit timeboyband.bandcamp.com.

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